Tuesday, September 21, 2010

De-cluttering My Life!

I am aware that it has been far too long since my last blog entry. I apologize for neglecting my blog. I truly want to improve by blogging more in the future. I had good intentions when I first made this blog to post updates every week, but sadly I have been so distracted with "clutter" in my life lately.

I have been battling with depression for several years. I decided to consulate a doctor earlier this year. He decided that I needed to be medicated to help me cope with stress and anxiety. Five months ago, I increased my dosage of my medication. It was like a band-aid that helped me temporary relieve some of my stress, but at the same time I felt like a zombie. The worst of it all, I was unable to feel anything at all. NUMB NUMB NUMB is not how to live in this world.... My husband has been unlucky with unstable jobs and frequent lay offs. Unfortunately, instead of dealing with my problems, I chose to avoid them completely by playing silly facebook games several hours a day. In addition sadly to say, I became the queen of withdrawal. Over the years, I tend to use games as my outlet to help me deal with life. It occurred to me about eight weeks ago that I have a serious game addiction AGAIN. Ugh! The interesting thing is around that same time my five year old e Machine desktop died... Arrrrrrrrrgh! We were luckily able to save some things on our external hard drive before it RIP! Eventually we need to take it into a computer repair shop to get a hard drive back up of the rest of the stuff such as my music from iTunes, some scrapbook projects, etc. Since the death of the e Machine, I have significantly decreased my time into gaming. I realize now gaming all day long is a waste of my time. We have an old laptop that has seen better days and could RIP in the near future. It cannot handle most of the games on facebook, lucky me, eh.

Another area in my life that I am addressing now is weight loss and being healthy. Since September 1, 2010, I have been keeping a food diary and exercising again. I have been impressed with the website called myfitnesspal.com It is not only free but is loaded with other people who are supporting me with my weight loss goals as well as there are resources I can use. So far, I have lost six pounds and feel great! I have a long journey ahead to lose more but I am happy to say that watching my calorie intake and increasing my physical activity have made a huge difference in my life. The bonus is my husband is doing it with me. Together we enjoy strength training, walking, hiking, and jogging. We look forward to the healthy changes as we continue to make good food choices and exercise on a regular basis.

So I decided a month ago to go off my medication cold turkey. I understand that some people are concerned about how my body will react to the change. However, I am happy to report that I feel more alive now even though our problems are not compeletly solved yet. Letting go of the clutter in my life and adding a little faith is helping me feel better. My supportive husband has been very patient with me and has given me many priesthood blessings to help me through the really hard days. I've found that having a higher power Heavenly Father in my life is helping me see what really matters most in my life.

My goal this week is to report our spring/summer activities, and exciting events that will take place this fall. So tune in, there is more to come from me.

2 comments:

The Cluff Family said...

Jen, you are so brave to share such an honest post. Good for you! My friend introduced me to My Fitness Pal just last week, and I love it! Do you know how to connect to friends on the site? My username is beccann, so maybe you can search for me.

Can't wait to see you guys soon. Keep up the good work - I can't wait until I lose 6 pounds!

Jennifer said...

Thank you for reading and your thoughts! I would be happy to cheer you on in your journey to weight loss! I look forward to seeing you in a couple weeks too! Love you!